Friday, March 4, 2016

Stay Close, Friend

It's been several months, perhaps even a year before I realize. I haven't seen some of my friends in what seems like ages. I feel that familiar twinge of guilt and I resolve to make some phone calls, set up some times to meet, arrange some play dates. My intentions are pure and I really mean to. But, in the busyness of life more time goes by.

My husband and I discussed it on one of our dates. The importance of friendship, the fact that other people - their ideas advice, and encouragement often help and build up your familial relationships. The support you receive from friends is important for your marriage and your role as parent. You cannot rely on your spouse to be all things - provide all things, play all parts. You often need advice from friends when dealing with new parenting adventures or when working on marital issues. Their advice often proves invaluable.

And yet, this time of life is so busy. As I write this two children are talking to me and one is crawling all over me. I have stopped writing at least a dozen times already. I wonder, "Who has time?"

If perchance I happen to get to talk to a friend on the phone it is frequently interrupted and we find ourselves saying, "Do you need to go?" with a common response of, "Yep."

Life is full and more important than writing in this space, phone calls, the novel I want to read, or the laundry that is still waiting to be folded are the needs of my children. Once they've gone to bed my attention turns to my husband because he needs my time just as much, if not more than my kids. He and I need to connect. We're doing this life together and we need one another's time, love, and focus. This is a period of time sacrifice.

I often find it rather funny that in these moments of complete insanity and sometimes hair pulling frustration when I want (need) the support of friendship more than ever I have so very little time for it myself. It seems rather backwards.

That is why I'm so incredibly thankful. 

Thankful for the friends who text even when I don't. 

Thankful for the friend who talks to me on the phone even though she's busy too.

Thankful for the friends who get why I'm late. 

Thankful for the friend who loves me where I am and not where she thinks I should be. 

Thankful for the friends who listen.

Thankful for the friends who speak grace.

Thankful for the friends who encourage.

Thankful for the friends who care about my marriage and my children.

Thankful for the friend who doesn't try to fix me.

I flake out more than I should, because my life is a lot right now. I don't always feel up to hosting things, going out at night, or talking on the phone because right now there's not much left over after a normal day at home. 

That is why I'm so grateful for all the women in my life. They enrich my life just by loving me where I am. I may not see them often. We may not get together as regularly as we'd like. We may not have the same ideas, opinions, or lives, but I dearly love my friends. Each and every one of them in their own way is beautiful and incredibly valuable to me.

Thank you for being my friend.

**** I wrote this before moving, and came across it today. Just had to share it because I still feel this.

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